Restarting life and dreams

When I was 23, my dad got a heart attack and needed a bypass operation.
A year later, he was diagnosed with a rare and progressive disease and was in and out of the hospital.

I was paying off medical bills since I was 23 and that means I was putting my life and dreams on hold for almost five years already.

People my age have the luxury to live their lives in their own ways and in their own terms — they travel, they go back to school, they party with friends, buy material things, some saves up and invests for their future. I, on the other hand, had to pay loans and medical-related debts.

My dad died on December 2019.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t regret the things that I did and the things that I sacrificed for my dad. I love him so much I would do it all over again. But I can’t deny the fact that I lost some time for myself and my dreams.

I graduated from the university six years ago but I feel like I am just about to start my life. I’ve lost time and there are opportunities that have passed and dreams that have died.

So how do you restart your life and dreams after years of putting them on hold?
Where do you start chasing them back?

I’m still as clueless. I feel like I am looking at an outdated map I made for myself many years ago, I have no idea where to start updating them.

So I started with this blog instead.

I am a very visual person and I need to see my plans and my progress and write through my thoughts for things to make sense. Hence, I decided to take on my journey with this blog.

I made this blog to carefully and slowly curate my life and my dreams. I made this to monitor my progress, to visualize my plans, to make sense of my thoughts and ideas. This is going to be the blueprint of my restarted life.

And this is what you can expect from this blog —

  1. Recently, as part of my┬álife updates, I also updated my years-old bucket list, in honor of my healthy years. It’s still in the works, though, as I want every item to be as intentional as possible. But expect that I will do everything in my power to cross out as many items as I possibly can, while I am still able. Because!!! I forgot to mention that the rare and progressive disease my dad had could be hereditary. So I am limiting my years to 60 years old max.
  2. Intentional Living. Unlike most people my age who had enough years to make mistakes and experiment, I, on the other hand, needs to be extra careful as I am not getting any younger. I want to be as intentional in all aspects — in my travels, in my relationships, with my spending, in all the business ventures and passion projects I will be taking on moving forward.
  3. I will also share with you the books that I’ve read because I kind of gave myself a challenge to read 100 books before 30, and that gives me 3 years. I decided to do this because I want to broaden my perspective, and also, to improve my writing techniques.
  4. I want to be of help to people like me who are struggling — struggling to start or to restart. I know, a lot of people can relate to what I’ve been through. Some might be supporting their younger siblings to school or are breadwinners in the family. Some might even be on the same boat as I am, paying off debts or supporting the medical needs of a sick parent or loved one. Someone out there has to put their lives on hold for their responsibilities or to give back to their families. I am one with you. I want to let you know, if ever you come across this blog, that you are not alone.
About Rainne

By the way, I am Rainne (b. 1993) and I was born and raised in Manila, Philippines. I earned my pre-med degree in Biology at Pamantasan ng Lungsod ng Maynila, a state university in the Philippines; I wanted to become a doctor. But I didn’t become one.

Currently, I am working as a sales representative in the pharmaceutical industry. That gives me enough time to focus on my career and my passion projects, such as this blog. I’m grateful for my job because it gives me room for personal growth and development. It gives me opportunities to interact and meet new people, every single day.

I will mostly blog about my experiences and my attempt to be as intentional with the way I live my life. I will blog about my bucket list and how I will accomplish every item given the limited time and budget that I have, in honor of my healthy years. I will basically blog about how I will enjoy every single moment, hoping to find the peace of restarting my life and my dreams.

And who knows, I might write about you.

To starting over.